A driver’s license.
When we were teenagers, it was our symbol of independence: the ability to go where we wanted, when we wanted, how we wanted. To not have to rely on others. To navigate – both literally and figuratively – independently.
So it’s not hard to imagine the agonizing implications for a senior who is no longer competent to drive. As one of our clients put it, “After decades of driving – of being able to get in your car and go where you want to go – it’s like having your arm cut off.”
When losing the ability to drive, part of the difficulty seniors face is practical – how to run errands and do shopping, how to attend social activities and get to medical appointments, how to visit children and grandchildren on their terms, on their schedule.
Sure, there are buses, taxis and loving family and friends who will gladly step in to help cover the gap, but this doesn’t eliminate the biggest hurdle – the loss of independence experienced precisely and at a time marked by many other potential losses: health, friends and community.
What Science Has to Say
Science says, very clearly: keep driving for as long possible.
Numerous studies illustrate the benefits in enabling (not allowing; rather, enabling) seniors to continue driving. Once a senior stops driving, there is an acceleration in dependency, social isolation and depression, and a decline in mental and physical well-being. Some studies show that seniors who stop driving have a greater risk of entry into long-term care, and a higher mortality than their counterparts who are still driving.
It’s good for them, but it is it good for the other drivers on the road?
Seniors are Better Drivers Than Most People Assume
In the early 2000s, the United States highway safety organizations (and the general public) were concerned that the increasing numbers of seniors driving would significantly increase the number of traffic accidents and fatalities.
Over a decade and a half later, we’ve seen that the concern didn’t materialize, and in fact, the fatal crash rates of senior drivers have decreased.
Seniors are actually one of the safest groups of drivers around, with one of the lowest crash rates. (True for Israeli drivers, too!)
They are more likely to wear seatbelts, and less likely to engage in risky behaviors like driving while intoxicated. Seniors are more likely to have the wisdom to know their own limitations, and choose to avoid situations (like highways or nighttime driving) where they feel they will be at a disadvantage.
There’s a “But” (A Big One)
Senior drivers still have a higher chance of dying in a crash than any other age group (except teenagers). Not necessarily because of bad driving (see above), but because their bodies are more fragile and frail, less capable of withstanding the damage wreaked by a crash. They’re more likely to suffer from complications. Age-related medical conditions such as heart disease, diabetes, and other illnesses can make it harder to recover from injuries.
Ultimately, if a senior is involved in a car crash, their risk of death is higher.
What About YOUR Parent?
Given all the information above, we urge you not to rush to judgement. There is no magic age that everyone needs to give up their car keys. Whether or not your parent should stop driving is a function of his or her overall health and individual risk factors.
Start by taking a look at some of the issues that may impair your parent’s ability to drive safely, such as:
- Problems with hearing or vision
- Medications and their side effects
- Painful arthritis that makes the movements of driving harder to perform
- Slower reaction time
Consider whether there are ways to compensate for some of these risk factors, such as:
- Avoiding situations which present a disadvantage (i.e. nighttime, highway driving)
- Driving slower and leaving more space between cars to compensate for slower reaction time
- Using training apps to strengthen weak skills
With awareness and wisdom, your parent may be able to continue driving safely (and reaping all the practical and emotional benefits) into her 80s and 90s.
When The Time Has Come
What do you do if your senior parent is not successfully compensating for his decreasing ability to drive safely?
How do you convey to your parent that he is dangerous behind the wheel – and help him make wise decisions as to his further driving?
Talk to your parent about your concerns. Express your fears and preferences, and certainly provide relevant information. Even though you may feel strong emotions here (and with good reason!), don’t slip into the role of “parenting your parent”.
Try identifying, together, which aspects of driving are most important to your parent.
- Is it the practical ability to get where they want, when they want?
- Is it the emotional significance of independence and self-sufficiency?
- Is it something you never thought of?
Once you understand what the issue is, you’ll be able to relate to those issues directly, and find ways to address or compensate for them if driving is really no longer an option.
Focus on helping your parent deal effectively with the changes that age brings. Try bringing up the possibility of using compensatory technologies:
- For vision: night vision and smart windshield
- Impact warnings: forward, rear, back-over warnings, some with automatic-connection to brake system
- Warning systems: for lane drifting, for fatigue, for rear-crash, forward-crash, and back-over warnings
- Automation: automated parking and self-driving cars
A Bumpy Road
There’s no doubt about it. Limiting a senior’s ability to drive is painful both for the senior and for their family members involved. With awareness, sensitivity and wisdom, however, you can help make this challenging road as smooth as possible. Just remember that “taking away the car keys” is a bit of a misnomer – they are not really yours to take.
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